Private communications

[foolishjustice]

Moshi moshi!

Comments

[makejapangreat]

[Oh.. his gaze softens a touch when Akechi relaxes like that, and after a moment he gets up and comes over, taking a seat not too far from him.]

Agreed. May I have some iced water?

[... at least he left off the "please"?]

[foolishjustice]

[Still a bit formal in the wording, but it does at least not sound quite like a formal request. He nods and holds out a bottle of cold water as he sits down.]

I guess it's probably too much to hope the buildings in this next Fissure still have working air conditioning...we were lucky enough that the last one was underwater.

[makejapangreat]

If the machines are still intact, I might be able to power them, at least... though, depending on how long it's been, they may have simply broken down over time.

[He takes the bottle thankfully and opens it, taking a drink.]

You're doing well, though. Even in spite of your fear, you've made a lot of progress in a short time. Still, I can't help but worry a little about how hard you're pushing yourself.

[foolishjustice]

...You saw how badly this affected me in the forest. If those tiger Noise had been real magical creatures, we both would've gotten hurt. Next time, they might be real.

Not to mention the Metaverse. I know for a fact that there are Shadows that resemble lions, and I've already been in one Palace here. I'd rather push myself in controlled circumstances than panic when there's real danger.

[makejapangreat]

Perhaps, but... That isn't to say you can't take breaks. This is an immensely stressful situation for yourself... and I'm proud of you for wanting to overcome your weaknesses.

[His tone softens.]

But exercise patience with yourself. If it were Akira or Kurama... you'd want them to pace themselves, wouldn't you?

[foolishjustice]

[He looks directly at Shido when he voices pride in him, before quickly glancing away and taking a drink of his soda.]

...I suppose you're right. I can be...more stubborn than I should be, at times.

[makejapangreat]

Your mother was fiercely stubborn as well. She wouldn't back down from a fight until she had won. Depending on the day, she might have either worked herself up to a frenzy, or froze hell over with one glance when she really got into it.

[He breathes out a heavy sigh, hand tensing around the bottle slightly and crinkling it as he looks down at it.]

What an awful hand she was dealt...

[foolishjustice]

...The gender wage gap is bad enough on its own, but it gets far worse if your employer knows you're a single mother. I don't remember a lot about her, but what I do remember...she struggled to earn enough to support us both. I never knew any of her family, either...they probably abandoned her when I was born.

[Even after his memory of her face started to fade, he still remembered the way the stress and exhaustion showed in her features. He worries his lip for a moment, then looks back at Shido.]

...It's why I can't help worrying when I see other people pushing themselves too hard. But maybe I'm a little too much my mother's son, huh?

[makejapangreat]

Her relationship with her family was strained to begin with. Kishi refused to act like a typical Japanese woman... domestic, quiet and obedient, and it'd been a point of tension with her strict family for a long time.

[He gives Akechi a weak, half-hearted smile.]

Nonsense. You're fine just the way you are. Just remember to go a little easier on yourself now and then.

[He takes another drink.]

[foolishjustice]

I'll...try. But I'm not really used to being able to go easy on myself. I've been emancipated since not long after I gained access to the Metaverse, and my job has never been particularly forgiving of my academic schedule. They expected that if I wanted to be respected and paid like an adult detective, I should be able to devote myself to my work like one, too.

But...our society is unforgiving regarding academics, as well. I couldn't afford to let my grades slip, so I bargained with my teachers for permission to skip classes for work as long as I kept up my studies in my own time. Combined with how demanding the media became, and the need to maintain my public image, my entire high school career has essentially required me to push myself constantly to keep up with my financial, academic, and social obligations.

I'm trying to break some of those ingrained habits now that I have most of my time free, but it's three years against six months...

[makejapangreat]

[... and then he had to do all that on top of what Shido demanded of him, too. This kid was incredible... His brow tenses, guilt flashing through his eyes for a moment before he looks back at Goro.]

You'll get there. Just have patience.

[And now he's going to go back to drinking that water some more, before splashing a little in his hand and rubbing it over his face and head.]

[foolishjustice]

...Maybe I could start with admitting when it's time to go inside. I can't relax in this heat.

[Actually, he's starting to wonder if it's possible to spontaneously Erase from overheating, but good luck getting him to admit it.]

[makejapangreat]

Agreed. Alright, how about this, then?

[He gets to a stand, and offers Akechi a hand up.]

Are you occupied tonight? We can resume at dusk once the heat's backed off.

[foolishjustice]

[By the time he offers his hand, Goro's already getting up...seemingly weightlessly, as his feet even lift up off the ground while he unfolds his legs. And then he's quickly heading for the station.]

That might be a better idea. Though...I should probably warn you that I see better in the dark when I'm wearing my masks.

[makejapangreat]

[He blinks, then awkwardly withdraws his hand and follows. At the mention of the masks, he gives... what is pretty obviously a forced chuckle, and his voice starts out light, but also sounds... forced.]

Warn me why? There's... [And it quickly falls flat, even slightly nervous as his gaze draws away.] no reason for me to be worried about that.

[foolishjustice]

[He just raises an eyebrow at that.]

You know...there's no point in pretending you're not afraid of Loki. He's my worst traits, manifested as a Persona...I think most people would be uncomfortable, even if they haven't been personally threatened with him.

[makejapangreat]

[Shido glances at Akechi, then looks like he's about to say something... but thinks better of it and just nods instead.]

I'll manage... especially if it's just the masks. Let's meet up back here at around nine.

[foolishjustice]

I'll try to stick to the red one. I don't...like having Loki active when I don't need him, anyway.

[Ahhhhhh, beautiful air conditioning. Don't mind him just...immediately going to flop on the common room couch, face down.]

Nine will do.

[makejapangreat]

[Well, that actually gets a small laugh out of him. He feels you, Goro...

He's going to go over and take a seat in a chair because he's boring.]

And why's that? [Annnd he's going to take another refreshing sip of water. Ahhh.]

[foolishjustice]

[Give him a moment to roll over, so he's not explaining to the couch cushions.]

I...don't know how much you actually know about Persona users, but I'm not typical. Most people only have one. For Wildcards like myself, or Akira, our Personas can affect our mindset. Loki tends to leave me feeling more volatile and temperamental.

[makejapangreat]

[He considers this.] I see... a mask changes your persona. In the Cognitive World, the metaphorical representation for how one presents oneself to the world manifests as a physical item... [Nod nod, makes perfect sense to him! He leans forward in his seat.]

Do you know why you're atypical?

[foolishjustice]

[Did he...visibly perk up, at the discussion of Metaverse mechanics?]

Exactly. A Persona user awakens by causing that representation to appear, and then removing it. Most of the time, a Wildcard's mask looks the same regardless of which Persona they're using, but Loki is...a little different.

[But moving onto the question...he looks away, shifting awkwardly to prop his shoulders up on the arm of the couch. If Shido leans to get a look at his face, he'll find he's glaring a hole in the floor. Otherwise, his grip on his soda bottle is tight enough to dent it.]

...Akira and I were both chosen by a malevolent entity to settle a bet between him and the being normally responsible for guiding Wildcards. He arranged events so that we would be opposed, with whichever one of us won determining whether he'd destroy the world or just enslave it.

[makejapangreat]

[Those words have his eyes widening, and he suddenly recalls one of his first conversations with Morgana in which they'd touched on "an evil god pulling strings behind the scenes".

Akechi was... chosen by him? And Shido had gotten... visions... he'd been told he was chosen...

. . .

He suddenly falls quiet, staring at the ground hard...]

[foolishjustice]

I'd thought I was given the Nav to free myself, but I was still someone's plaything...

[He glances back at Shido, noting the way he's staring at the ground. And his thoughts...]

...All of Japan was nothing but his chess board.

[makejapangreat]

[He was someone's plaything... someone's chess piece...

He got those visions so long ago. Those visions that warped his view, making him arrogant and foolish... and brutal. His personal life fell away in favor of his goals. His morality... everything did.

Everything, including the woman he loved.

A breath of disbelief escapes him, and his hand tightens around his water bottle, causing a loud crinkling noise. There is something livid entering his gaze, and the hand holding the bottle trembles slightly.

It was him.

It was him.]