Private communications

[foolishjustice]

Moshi moshi!

Comments

[makejapangreat]

[Shido glances at Akechi, then looks like he's about to say something... but thinks better of it and just nods instead.]

I'll manage... especially if it's just the masks. Let's meet up back here at around nine.

[foolishjustice]

I'll try to stick to the red one. I don't...like having Loki active when I don't need him, anyway.

[Ahhhhhh, beautiful air conditioning. Don't mind him just...immediately going to flop on the common room couch, face down.]

Nine will do.

[makejapangreat]

[Well, that actually gets a small laugh out of him. He feels you, Goro...

He's going to go over and take a seat in a chair because he's boring.]

And why's that? [Annnd he's going to take another refreshing sip of water. Ahhh.]

[foolishjustice]

[Give him a moment to roll over, so he's not explaining to the couch cushions.]

I...don't know how much you actually know about Persona users, but I'm not typical. Most people only have one. For Wildcards like myself, or Akira, our Personas can affect our mindset. Loki tends to leave me feeling more volatile and temperamental.

[makejapangreat]

[He considers this.] I see... a mask changes your persona. In the Cognitive World, the metaphorical representation for how one presents oneself to the world manifests as a physical item... [Nod nod, makes perfect sense to him! He leans forward in his seat.]

Do you know why you're atypical?

[foolishjustice]

[Did he...visibly perk up, at the discussion of Metaverse mechanics?]

Exactly. A Persona user awakens by causing that representation to appear, and then removing it. Most of the time, a Wildcard's mask looks the same regardless of which Persona they're using, but Loki is...a little different.

[But moving onto the question...he looks away, shifting awkwardly to prop his shoulders up on the arm of the couch. If Shido leans to get a look at his face, he'll find he's glaring a hole in the floor. Otherwise, his grip on his soda bottle is tight enough to dent it.]

...Akira and I were both chosen by a malevolent entity to settle a bet between him and the being normally responsible for guiding Wildcards. He arranged events so that we would be opposed, with whichever one of us won determining whether he'd destroy the world or just enslave it.

[makejapangreat]

[Those words have his eyes widening, and he suddenly recalls one of his first conversations with Morgana in which they'd touched on "an evil god pulling strings behind the scenes".

Akechi was... chosen by him? And Shido had gotten... visions... he'd been told he was chosen...

. . .

He suddenly falls quiet, staring at the ground hard...]

[foolishjustice]

I'd thought I was given the Nav to free myself, but I was still someone's plaything...

[He glances back at Shido, noting the way he's staring at the ground. And his thoughts...]

...All of Japan was nothing but his chess board.

[makejapangreat]

[He was someone's plaything... someone's chess piece...

He got those visions so long ago. Those visions that warped his view, making him arrogant and foolish... and brutal. His personal life fell away in favor of his goals. His morality... everything did.

Everything, including the woman he loved.

A breath of disbelief escapes him, and his hand tightens around his water bottle, causing a loud crinkling noise. There is something livid entering his gaze, and the hand holding the bottle trembles slightly.

It was him.

It was him.]

[foolishjustice]

[He jumps at the sudden noise, staring at Shido in open alarm for a second. That look of anger brings to mind past conversations, moments when Shido would lash out at him.

But...he has nothing to fear from Shido's temper anymore, right? The anger...probably isn't even at him. Yaldabaoth is the one who treated them both like pawns.]

Did...you ever notice the public acting...strangely?

[makejapangreat]

[If Shido notices Akechi's reaction or words, he doesn't make any indication of it. Instead he's lost in his mind, a fire growing in his eyes by the second.

The water bottle crackles more in his hand, knuckles turning white...]

[foolishjustice]

[He falls silent when his question goes unacknowledged. The next step would obviously be saying Shido's name, but...he's not sure he wants to draw his attention if he's so angry he can't even pay attention to simple words.

Instead, he sits up, back to the armrest and legs folded. He'll just...take this moment to drink some more of his soda.]

[makejapangreat]

It was him. It was him all this time...

[A little smirk comes to his face, something incredibly dark in the expression.]

I found the woman of my life, and so many times... so many times, I thought to myself... that she was the one. That I could live the rest of my life, happy, with her.

And then I started to get visions, and at first I thought I was just going mad, and yet... Slowly.. surely.. I was pulled in... by the promise of greatness. Of power.

He... that entity... he took her from me! [His voice raises.] From us!

[foolishjustice]

[He flinches away as Shido raises his voice, capping his soda again as he tucks his legs further under him.]

...That's how he works. He...makes you think you can accomplish your goals, but arranges things to tempt you to the kind of behavior he wants. It's technically your own choice, but the deck is stacked the way he wants it.

[makejapangreat]

How could I have been so stupid?!

[He stands up, then, water bottle clenched tightly in his hand as he gestures.]

Of course it was just a damned ruse the whole time! Being god's chosen one— hah! I fucking knew it was too good to be true, but did I listen? No, why the hell would I, when I could've finally had all the power I finally needed to fix everything my way!

[foolishjustice]

[His eyes go wide at Shido's sudden move to his feet, and he immediately shifts so that he can manifest his wings, secondary feathers hanging over the edge of the couch, to fold one of them between him and Shido. It's not much of a shield, he knows, especially since any sort of harsh movement of the feathers would hurt...but it's a comfort to have something opaque between them. He doesn't bother saying anything this time...Shido doesn't seem to be paying attention, anyway.]

[makejapangreat]

If only I'd taken enough time to get my head out of my ass, maybe then everything wouldn't have gone to hell, and—

[He trails off when he sees the white wing covering Goro, and he feels his stomach drop out. The anger drains out of him quickly as he takes in his son... hiding away from him behind his wing.

What is he... doing? He's... acting exactly like the kind of monster he used to be, isn't he? He swallows thickly and squints his eyes closed for a moment, then lets his gaze flick to the bottle in his hand, which he quietly sets on the arm of the chair he'd been on. After a long, hesitant moment, he breathes out.]

Akechi, I...

[His hand comes up and rubs down his face roughly... before he looks over, mouth thinning for a moment... For a moment, he glances away, thinking about just leaving, but... hah. He'd see Akechi later again anyway, wouldn't he?

No, he... he needs to address this. To confront this. This is part of the consequences of his sins.

He swallows, then walks over to the couch where Akechi is seated. He gets down on his knees in front of him.

Quietly, he reassures him:]

Akechi. It's okay.

[foolishjustice]

[His feathers part just enough for him to peek between them, before quickly closing again with a ruffling noise. He'll just...talk from behind here, alright?]

It's not even directed at me, but...I probably look pathetic.

[makejapangreat]

[He takes in a deep breath, brow pinched as he looks at those white feathers. He shakes his head.]

It's not you.

[He closes his eyes briefly, releasing a frustrated, tense breath before he looks back at that wing.]

Do you want me to leave?

[foolishjustice]

I...

[He pauses to swallow, wings shifting with the motion of his body.]

I think I want to be alone, at...least until I calm down.

[makejapangreat]

[His gaze flicks down, and then he gives a little nod.]

...alright. I'm sorry.

[He gets to a stand, looking at that wing for a few more seconds.]

...just message me, later on, if you still want to continue the lesson tonight.

[And with that? He's going to walk off.]

[foolishjustice]

[Hours later, but not quite when they'd agreed to try again, Shido will be getting a text from Goro.]

We should talk about what happened earlier.

[makejapangreat]

[It takes, perhaps, a full minute for the answer, but then:]

I'm so sorry for losing my temper earlier, Akechi. I should have been more considerate of how it might've affected you. I was so angry when I realized I'd been manipulated, but that's no excuse for letting my anger get the best of me. I should be better than that now.

sliiiiiiiiiiiides in here

[hairpincurves]

[And thankfully, Akira manages to miss Shido walking off.

She's coming back from the library and when she notices-- wait are those wings?

It takes her getting a bit closer to see the ponytail and identify that as Goro and that... has her worried. So, immediately she's going to the kitchen and about fifteen minutes later, she's returning with a plate of freshly baked chocolate cookies.]

... Akechi-kun...

[foolishjustice]

[The smell of cookies is enough to get him to peek back between his feathers. He doesn't lower the wing entirely, but there is enough space between his parted feathers to confirm it's him. If she leans in to look through the gap herself, she'll see that he's curled up, with something dark held tightly in his arms.]

Sorry, I must look ridiculous...